Staying On Top of the Game: Declining Invitations Gracefully Treat every invitation as a mere compliment and that way declining the invitation is a lot easier to do!! When someone invites you to a group, a party, an event, or to be a member that’s a MASSIVE compliment!! They’re saying “hey, we like you, we can tell you’re a good person, we want to interact with you more often or on a regular basis”. So often very nice and grateful people find it difficult to decline invitations they can’t accept [...]
relationships
Relationship goal achievement and fulfillment, achieving success with uplifting relationships, clarifying your ideal chemistry, creating rapport with good medicine people.
No Advice Please!
In my years I’ve given and received a lot of advice. Sometimes I’ve lucidly expressed and shared wisdom or my own or received brilliant tokens of wise suggestions from others. However, not until recently did I start to scrutinize the Value (or lack-thereof) of the advice I received from others. Upon this scrutiny, I quickly realized that some advice is not so valuable and is possibly dangerous!. We all are told to “listen to our elders” and heed advice carefully, but we’re rarely told to watch out for advice! I [...]
Adulthood? Smells more like Youth-hood
Mencius – “The great man is he whom does not lose his child’s heart.” What is the criteria for Adulthood? At a closer glance, it ends up looking more like Criteria for Perpetual Youth! So let’s lay the groundwork. WHAT DOES make you an adult??!!! We may consider ourselves as much of an adult as we consider ourselves a teen or even a toddler. I think the same is true for the rest of the world and all the people in it — we’re as much adults as we are [...]
Trusting Intuition and Engaging Only Trustworthy People
Trusting and Most Importantly LIVING OUT your Intuitive Knowings and Understandings The crazy and most disturbing and frustrating thing about no resources in Chicago, is that I KNEW that back in 2006 when I went to CA. I knew I didn’t want to go back to Chicago and when I went to my CC graduate and then on to LA, I had set in my mind that I was done with Chicago. But then biological family and other people contradicted that personal conviction. I think my uncle, my dad, my [...]
Trust
Being one of the most integral components of a functioning human relationship, trust creates harmony, but too much of it engenders dangerous vulnerability. A healthy amount of trust allows two or more humans to experience openness and congruence with one another. From this one learns the benefits of altruism, the joy of selflessness, and warmth of giving. Furthermore, an inadequate amount of trust creates a conscience lacking in warmth and expression, riddled with conspiracy and checkered with subterfuge. Nevertheless, if one resorts to any extreme of trust – too much [...]
True Love Is Psychotic
True love, that genuine rare art form, is ultimately psychotic. Learn to love the wild. Embrace the rifts, tides, and currents of that change. Create your unknown and then live to understand your reality. Truth is subjective; discover your own wisdom and comprehend the desires of your intrinsic beauty. This should function as a wake-up call for all your music. No more snooze or booze; time to use your capacity for that rhythmic sagacity.
The Danger of "Why"
When we ask “why?” to a friend, we must carefully choose our intention so that it is only derived from a genuine source of energizing grace. “Why?” frequently can insinuate covert aggression, harbor anger destructively, and it can imply dubious lack of faith in a person. Why BLANK? Why not? Why ask why? You ask why because you need justification. You do not believe. If you didn’t understand, you would ask “How?”. How explains. Why adjudicates. Why is a question of judgment and as Kierkegaard pointed out, “when you label [...]
The 4 Steps to the Seduction Process
DISCLAIMER: Quality seduction — authentic seduction — is not about exploitation, but, rather, fulfillmnet. The seduced are left with realized desires and long-kept fantasies are brought to the surface. Genuine seduction, therefore is a form of life empowerment, leaving one with new and expanded horizons. Seduction fulfills the consciously unacknowledged need or craving — seduction listens to the unspoken desire. Everyone has psyche gaps and cravings. Your inner voice needs air to breathe. That inner voice frequently lusts out and is always lurking beneath the surface of your psyche.While you [...]
Sprinkle People
I like to include everything in a single email, but wanted to add this: I am definitely the “imprisoned celebrity”, “land-locked-soulseeker” , now. There is a key and completely essential distinguishing characteristic between financial currency and spiritual currency: you survive with financial currency, but you truly live with spiritual currency. This is not saying to discard financial currency because clearly, without basic survival needs you would be suffering. But so few people ever actually truly live – live their dreams, access their potential, and enjoy the articulation of their talents. [...]
EDRT Advice
20th Century, Irish Playwright, Brendan Francis, said it perfectly: “People who ask our advice almost never take it. Yet we should never refuse to give it, upon request, for it often helps us to see our own way more clearly.” “The advice you deliver to others, frequently gets rerouted to end up on your front porch” (we can call that phenomenon, “externally-directed, but reflectively-targeted advice (or EDRT advice) because it is advice that we externally direct to help an external person, but that advice frequently reflects back to targeting us…okay, [...]
Escape Logical Snares
My work is to not denounce reason and logic and become an idiot. Rather, my work, my interest is the transcend and supercede logic so that it can’t snare your impassioned emotions. Emotions bring joy but you can rationalize away happiness with logic. So I don’t criticize overly-logical people, but I have most fun aiming to confuse them with their own logic in a highly advanced method so that they can never “pinpoint” my happiness. If someone “understand you”, they inevitably make judgments about you and your state. Emotions are [...]
Celebrity Conglomerate Syndrome
Erik Erikkson talked about (after the search for identity commences) four stages of identity development, diffused(haven’t started), foreclosed (prematurely defined), moratorium (still defining), and achieved (identity achievement). One of the biggest things preventing people from reaching identity achievement is “celebrity conglomerate syndrome” (CCS). Where you pick and choose bits and pieces of a celebrity’s personality or clothing or style or appearance to mimick and pile them onto yourself. The problem with this? You end up losing and burying yourself. Your strongest aspect — your identity — gets buried and that’s [...]
2 Types of Pursuits & 4 Types of People
Blaise Pascal said there are 2 types of people in the world, those seeking god (providing rationality) and those who have found God (providing happiness) Of that, you get this: Neglecters — don’t seek God (irrational); don’t find god (unhappy)Fantasizers — don’t seek God (irrational); do find god (happy)Seekers– seek god (rational); don’t find god (unhappy)Believers — seek god (rational); do find god (happy). I don’t want to be a fantasizer with (not saying that acting is godly at all, but…) acting. I don’t want to have this pretend conception [...]
Take Actions with the Active Voice
When the sordid, uncertain, or fear-based moment arises we frequently turn inwardly. Phobic fear causes us to focus in on ourselves. Most importantly it turns us into passive beings. We are not intrinsically, authentically, naturally passive beings. When we go “passive” we begin seeking outwardly for guidance, advice, forms of faith or knowledge. This is the basis of the enormous self-help genre in bookstores. Now granted, those books are incredibly worthwhile and poignant and offer insightful messages. But you have the capacity to write the same material you read, but [...]
About Changing Other People
I want to help other people — -if they’re behind in IT, I want to give them a boost to becoming more internet savvy. If they want social, interpersonal change I provide the opportunity to flush out doubts and insecurities and heal old wounds. If they want motivation, I have got thousands of quotes and inspirational speeches and blurbs. However, I was trying to do ALL of that – techie savvyness, interpersonal change, and motivation to people who didn’t want that. For example, I believe psychological diagnoses are incriminating. If [...]
Commencing Peace & Smiling More
The profoundly personally uplifting and extra-personally revitalizing effects of smiling are clear. We should be interested in authentically smiling more. It makes others feel happy, but essence of a good smiling exchange lies in the motive. The intention can’t be to smile for the other person because then you’re going to want to elicit a certain reaction and set yourself up for failure. When you demand a reaction from another person (ideally a positive one) your mood automatically gets transferred to the other party. If you smile for the other [...]
Do I listen to other people?
A lot of people have asked if I receive directions well? If I listen well and can easily apply things that others suggests. Let me explain this. I listen VERY well if the message is profound. If the messenger has deep conviction. If the requester or the messenger has fully considered what the situation is like from my shoes. If the person is delivering the message from a completely selfless stance, then I listen and react and act almost instantaneously. Unfortunately, when people speak from a conceited, inflated ego and [...]
Poignant Persons of Other Realms
Despite the bizarreness of the interrogation and the fact that this inquiry ranks quite highly on the “oddity scale”, you should ask this. I guess you have to ask it now. This is quite an peculiar inquiry. However, while some irrationally classify it as mystical, Oiji board, cheesy BS, this communication is practiced by highly-successful individuals. The practice is staying in touch with those who’ve transferred to different realms. Do you still communicate with dead relatives or close friends? Do you check in and share your news or ask for [...]
Eliminate the Five Masks to Fully Experience Our Five Faces
Everyone wears 5 masks: The Psychological — Labeling, maladaptive diagnosing The Computational — Looping, repetition, mindless tasks The Political — Prohibiting, barring The Dramatic — Disuading emotions The Literary — Mental illusions, ennui These five masks protect one from false vulnerability, creating an illusion of spuriousness, but deleteriously conceal our five faces. The masks great a game — fantastic, alert, and drawing from multiple intellects for people interaction. Everyone has 5 faces: Nature — Ocean, Flowers’ mathematical precision of Fibonacci, wavelengths, frequency Sex — Passion, Excitement, Affection, Joy, Happiness Music [...]
John Gray’s Home Improvement
Authors frequently generalize, stereotype and and create archetypes for the source of their books. Examples are self-help book authors who rely on typical problems and then profer meditative solutions or affirmations or the like. Out of all the generalizations I’ve read, John Gray’s stereotyping of typical roles of men and women is so flawlessly accurate that it redefines the definition of “steretype”. Women try to improve men and men try to fix problems of women (or simply don’t listen to women). EVERY single encounter with a woman within 10 years [...]
Boy Chase Girls, Girls Chase Boys
Boys chase girls; Girls chase boys. There is a SERIOUS problem going on in the dating, matrimonial, relationship world between men and women these days. John Gray has caught onto it, many self-help conselors have brushed on it. It’s this constant contradictory, amorphous web of, as Gray puts it, “women constantly trying to improve men” and men “not listening to women and always needing to fix things. This archetype is more pervasive than any other I have ever seen and yet it is the least noticed and acknowledged. About every [...]
A Compassionate Correlation
One thing I’ve noticed is that, the more I converse with any given person, the more compassion I develop for them. The time spent in a dialogue is directly proportional to the expediency of reaching a tipping point where the tendency to overlook flaws and examine strengths becomes greater than the proclivity to zero-in on problems with the person. That says, therefore, that we must engage in dialogues of more thoroughness and of greater duration…increasing the propensity for compassion. Update 2011, July 9: What incoherent mumbling babble. The only [...]
Lennon was not a Sculptor
Sinead O’Connor says “We all loved John Lennon better for all the mad things he did – the way he was interested in just tearing open the sky. He was definitely the sexiest of the Beatles because he was angry and edgy. And look at what he did with his fame. He didn’t use it to suck [up] and get more money and be liked by everybody. In fact, that’s the powe rof John Lennon to me: he was real. Even in the songs, he was never afraid to show [...]
Embrace the Karass, Discard the Granfalloon
You assimilate with people surrounding you, and manufacture symmetry with the beings you frequently encounter. Through a psychology transparency you either adapt and assume through simulation or mimicry, the qualities you prefer, or resiliently choose to not acquire qualities your detest. This social vehicle of the people you interact with, live with, work with, have recreation with ideally should be a karass not a granfalloon. According to Kurt Vonnegut, a karass is a spontaneous, serendipitously orchestrated group — “a team that do[es] God’s Will without ever discovering what they are [...]
The Deliberates (Warm) and the Festies (Cold)
At the apex of linguistic mastery, there emerges two distinct and corresponding methods of correspondence. One is not better than the other; neither is good nor bad, just dichotomous. The first conversational temperate is the deliberates. They are the Tony Robbins, the James K’s. Their element is the earth — the tree. They are calm, warm, slow, deliberate, Oak-like, in demeanor, and their words are the essence of the person’s message. Note that, even though they depict the opposite of Cold feisties, they are not “hot” because hot connotes waspish [...]
